A Better Way to Show

By Julie Daines


I've been reading about my favorite subject lately, imagery in literature, and I keep coming across the term objective correlative. As I delved deeper, I realized that was exactly what my current work in progress is missing.

Objective correlative is a term coined by T. S. Elliot. He said:

The only way of expressing emotion in the form of art is by finding an "objective correlative"; in other words, a set of objects, a situation, a chain of events which shall be the formula of that particular emotion; such that when the external facts, which must terminate in sensory experience, are given, the emotion is immediately evoked.

What does that mean? Essentially, an objective correlative is a type of metaphor where certain symbols or objects are used to express or allow an understanding of usually incomprehensible emotions or feelings.

In our current world of show but don't ever upon penalty of death tell, it's easy to get bogged down in trying to describe the physical traits of sadness, regret, nostalgia, etc. Tears, a sinking feeling in the stomach, furrowed brow--these are all becoming cliche. So how do you show what your character is feeling without being cliche?

The answer: Objective correlative! 


Here are some examples:

I just saw the movie The Eagle wherein a young man wants to redeem his father's name and restore honor to his family. As a child, his father gave him a carved amulet of an eagle--symbolic of the great golden eagle standard of Rome and of his father's honor and love. When the audience is meant to feel the main character's desire to recover his family's honor, he fondles the amulet and immediately we know what he is thinking and feeling. The eagle amulet is an objective correlative.

In one of my earlier novels the main character feels tremendous guilt for causing the death of her boyfriend in a car accident. She has a scar from that accident, and when I want to show that she is feeling shame and guilt because of what she did, all she has to do is reach up and try to cover her scar. The act of covering her scar is an objective correlative.

In Lord of the Rings, Aragorn is conflicted about his place as king. He feels unworthy because of the treachery of his ancestor, Isildur, who kept the Ring for himself instead of destroying it when he had the chance. Aragorn worries he will also become weak and susceptible to corruption when faced with an opportunity for power. All the audience needs to see is a quick flashback of Isildur's treachery to know exactly how Aragorn feels. That quick glance to the past is an objective correlative.

So when my critique group told me my main character was too whiney in my last chapter. That's when it hit me, he doesn't have his objective correlative yet. He needs that symbol to show without telling exactly how he feels.

After all, a picture is worth a thousand words. In literature, an objective correlative is just a written picture.


Julie's Blog: After the Toilets

Imagery: Beyond the Simile

I recently read a book laden with abrupt and belabored simile. The author constantly used the phrases seemed as if it was, and it was as if. You might say, “Ah, a newbie writer!” Not so. It was a Pulitzer Prize winning author. She’s the exception. For the rest of us, we might need help digging our way out of the simile rut.

So I want to talk about other forms of imagery besides the overused simile.

Metaphor: Quick review—the difference between metaphor and simile is that simile states the comparison overtly. In metaphor, the comparison is absent and the similarity of the two elements is simply implied.

Simile: He had a mouth like a leech. Or, Morning fog covered the city like a blanket.

Metaphor: He had a leech’s mouth. Or, A blanket of morning fog covered the city.

In both examples fog is compared to a blanket. But in the second, the likeness is implied and morning fog simply is a blanket.

Watch out for mixed metaphors. Shakespeare got away with it: To take arms against a sea of troubles (Hamlet). But for us lesser geniuses, editors don’t really like it. For a funny list of mixed metaphors, go here: http://therussler.tripod.com/dtps/mixed_metaphors.html

Analogy: When the metaphor or simile is explained or drawn out. This example begins with a metaphor: She was the sun, then continues to explain, brightening everyone’s existence and dazzling them with her radiance. But she’d burn anyone who came too close.

It could also begin with a simile, She was like the sun.

Synecdoche: This is one of my favorites because it can be very powerful, but must be used sparingly. This is when a part of something stands in place for the whole. Here is an example: The Commandant gave the signal, and a circle of dark helmets closed in around me.

Everyone knows that helmets can’t move by themselves, they must be attached to a body. But the meaning is clear; the helmets stand in place for the soldiers. Using this kind of imagery creates an added dimension of fear and tension.

The opposite is also a form of synecdoche—when a whole stands in for a part.

Personification: Everyone knows this one and we use it without even thinking about it. It’s when human characteristics are given to non-human elements. Example, The morning chill wrapped a blanket of fog over the city.

The morning can’t really wrap anything, but this sounds much better than The morning chill caused the moisture in the air to condense and form into fog that affected the entire city.

Metonymy: When the name of one thing is replaced by something else closely associated with it. This is a useful way to avoid repetition. Example, The students anxiously awaited the outcome of the voting. When the winner was announced, the entire campus breathed a sigh of relief.

The campus can’t sigh, but readers understand that it is used in place of students, which would have sounded awkward and repetitious (and boring).

Oxymoron and Paradox: Images that are so contradictory they stick in our minds. Examples: painfully beautiful, deafening silence, alive with emptiness, visible darkness.

That’s probably enough for one post. Just keep in mind that by using these devices, it allows us to go beyond the real and draw in those things that are thousands of years old or as present as anthrax in your mailbox. (The Creative Writer’s Style Guide) It creates in the reader an intense connection that ignites their imagination.

So, my suggestion is, whenever we, as writers, include a simile in our work, stop and think. Ask yourself, would this be better as a metaphor? Is there another type of imagery I can use to enhance my meaning in this instance besides the haggard simile?

Julie Daines
www.juliedaines.com